To This I Keep
by shel-shel
Summary: Its a little OC story that I came up with. Basically there is someone else in the Cullen Family that has a dark histroy and now the Cullen family will see first hand at what actually happened to her. I know I suck at summeries, srry


I paced the room. I heard the clock chime, it was three o'clock. Great another hour, minute, second closer. It was begging to be closer to the time that I had to share my story with everyone. Edward, Carlisle, and Esme had already heard parts of my story, I couldn't bring myself to finish it. But I also couldn't finish it because I didn't know the ending to it.

Like Jasper I viewed the world differently. But my views were auroras and spirits. Auroras were the lights that were around people, the lights would indicate if you were evil or good. It was very hard to hide something that you really are from a person that can 'see' your personality.

I remember how Edwards looked, when he came back to Carlisle and Esme. It was a mixture of colors, like a sunset, only it was a wide contrast of darks and lights. I could see that he had a hard time finding himself. We all saw it, and I couldn't blame him. That's why I kept a good distance from him. I remember the day he left. I had only been a vampire for seven months or so. I had always told myself that I was the reason why he left.

It was my fault.

I was already used to this from when I was a human, it was very common. I had always thought that there was something about me that made him want to leave. I spent a number of years trying to figure out the answer to that question when he came back. I was distant.

I would leave him alone and act like the shadow in the family. I instead spent hours by the water. But even there I didn't find confort. The water reminded me of Jack, he was my brother. I found him face down in the water so many years ago.

Or atleast that's what I told myself. I saw him die. It was Victoria and another female vampire that were there. She drank every last drop of his blood but he was somehow still alive. The other vampires ability was to control life and I assume that she kept him alive enough for him to drown. I watched all of this. I saw him crossover.

I couldn't get to him. I was in the spirit world somehow. I would later find out how I got there. But I'll explaine that later.

I could tell by Carlisle and Esme's expressions and tone of voice that they were worried about me. Why on heaven or earth would they be worried about me? I was the outcast. I drove Edward away from them.

I was in my room sketching. Sketching past memories. There was a presence in the room. I thought it would have been Carlisle or Esme asking if I wanted to talk or go hunting. But it was instead the very last person I thought I would see.

Edward.

He hesitantly walked toward me. I could hear the floor boards creek every time he took a step. I felt a hard hand rest on my shoulder. I looked up and it was him. I knew that he could read my mind and pick out any information that he wanted. I was glade now that I knew several languages. But I used the one that almost everyone in my family spoke. Russian.

I started to hide all of my thoughts in Russian. I looked up at his face. His eyes were returning to their golden topaz state. There was still a hint of red in them. I tried my hardest to keep my distance from him. It almost worked. But keeping secrets in a very hard thing around here to do.

"Clarissa?" His voice was gentle. I don't even know why he would talk to me?

I was the reason why he left……..right? But he wanted to talk to me. None the less I had to be polite.

"Yes, Edward. What would you like to ask? Actually I thought you would have my mind."

His face was released. I think that he knew that was coming. I could see the irritation that being hinted in his eyes. He wasn't used to not being able to read someones mind or in my case translate mine.

"I do think that I deserved that. And you are right I normally do go through someone's mind, but in your case it's in another language. I don't even think that I've learned it."

I tried to hide my laughter but a slight chuckle did escape. Edwards face brightened. "So I see you can smile. Well I guess that would be a relief for Esme and Carlisle. They were actually worried about you. I hate to see Esme be sad. Her face looks like someone took a piece of her heart. I know I've done enough damage, but I don't want you to do the same mistakes as I have to them."

His tone was filled with remorse. It was like he was pleading with me not to hurt them. I don't think Edward would understand that they were one of the few best things that has ever happened to me. This was like one of those things I prayed for, two parents that loved each other and their family very much, no matter what happened.


End file.
